This week, I finished editing the video I shot during my six-day trip to the Florida Panhandle. A month and a half, plus who knows how many ungodly hours, was the amount of time invested.

Why do I get the feeling it took me forever to get it done, when it could have taken me less time? After all, it is only fifteen minutes long (almost, if you count the closing credits). 

Any other idiot would have taken him two weeks, at most. So, why am I practicing self-torture for something I actually feel quite proud of?

I’ll give myself credit for having been highly meticulous with the selection of shots, the music, the sound effects—everything. The end results are to my satisfaction, and if I change anything in the video, I will probably ruin it.

Unfortunately, the doing-it-all-alone and filmmaker-wannabe methods aren’t useful in today’s constant churning of visual content online. If I can’t be consistent, might as well do something else.

This is why I don’t think I will be doing another video like White Sand, White People & Crabs, or God, Slaves & Half-Naked Tourists for a while. They were arduous to make and I enjoyed the burnout, but sometimes I have to remind myself I’m not doing a Hollywood film.

Perhaps I still long to make something of that scale, but it won’t matter if it will end up on YouTube. It is an entirely different format with a unique set of rules and dynamics.

Twenty years ago, I attended film school hoping to make it on the big screen as a writer and director. Today, you can share anything with the public and not have agents, executives and distributors slamming the door on your face.

I feel fortunate and glad that I can find an audience out there, even though I have to put in all of the work and planning myself. At the same time, I wish I could tell a story, in fictional, audiovisual format using the available platforms.

That project may be farther down the line, and I will have to release more videos in the meantime to make that happen. And while I get there, I must sacrifice certain ambitions and habits.

It is perfectly doable, but sometimes I can’t help wanting to go that little extra mile to make it better, bigger, more perfect. This time, I have no excuses.

This new media isn’t about making the best video about anything. It is about staying relevant.